weekend ..

last fri, went to bbq which is organised by my poly friends.
it was at east coast. though it is far, but i dun mind going there.
cuz it's been a long time since i met my poly friends.

when i reach at 7 plus, most of them have reached already.
too bad lg, AR and Xg did not come. sian...
but at least, some of the seniors came back.
the food was not bad, better than the bbq food held in SP during the freshmen orientation camp.
LoL

Jeno was the chef, again.. he likes to cook for everyone. LoL
we bought some drinks, and i bought 2 packets of sparklers.
each packet contain 6 small boxes of sparklers.
the guys did not play with the sparker alone.
nic used the sparklers and make rockets out of it.
the purpose is to watch the sparklers fly like rocket upward into the sky.
LoL

but all the rockets he made was a failure. haha! k..
in the end, smoke was emitted from it and burned up the rockets.
too bad, i forget to record it down and post it up on youtube.
LoL

at least, i went to the bbq and enjoyed myself.
on sat, i stayed home and do housework.
Mom bought new sofas from a caucasian.
erm... i think not buy. it is more like the caucasian moved house, so he gave away his furniture.
it was a UK imported good, cost bout SGD1000. wooohh
we had to clean up the house, sweep floor, mop floor, iron clothes, and clear our own misc stuffs.
Mom was havin menopause for whole day. kept nagging around. sian
at nite, she even scolded sis and beat her, cuz sis talked back to her. haizz T______________T

lucky, on sun, i went jamming.
it's been a month since we last jammed. yeah!! but we still need 1 more guitarist. this time, we'll find a male guitarist den. cuz been lookin around for female guitarist. so hard to find. and our bassist is male. my leader (drummer) suggested that we get a male guitarist to accompany the bassist. wtf?!!?

though we are not a pure gal band, but at least, the male bassist has the right attitude to work with us and has the skills. surprisingly, he went for guitar lessons at yamaha, but changed to bass, as he was not able to find a bassist to jam with (when he is a guitarist). haha.
as for me, i wanted to be guitarist. but turned to vocal instead. cuz been singing for few years. and is more easier to practice at any place and any time.

den, after jamming, we sat outside the studio and chatted for a long time.
after tt, went to ah ma house for dinner, met up with rest of family members. as there is a karaoke system at ah ma house, therefore, ah ma often ask us go her house to have dinner and have karaoke session.

everyone enjoyed themself .
at least it is one good way to destress.
and i decided to treat jamming as a hobby. cuz i will never know what it will lead me to. and at least, it is also one way of destressing at end of week.
LoL

*throws glasses*

for the past 2 nights, my mom keep talkin to me, nag , scold me. lucky she did not beat me up.

if not, i think i would have really jump off the 18th level(live at 18 floor) or take the fan and beat her to death.
she dun support me for joining a band. but she allow me to go for it. cuz she wants to see, wad i can do in the band.
she commented harshly that if i joined for fun and treat it as a hobby, it is still fine. but I am serious in it, and that pissed her off.
hey.. though many ppl find tt joining band is cool and fun, but i am really treating it seriously.

I dun like to do things halfway. I want it to be successful, if not , at least , i have experience and i may join some misc singing competition, go taiwan,
and progress further. even if i can't be a big star, at least, i can compose songs and sell to those singers. by composing and selling songs to them can also earn some money.

at least currently, i am working full time. so i have money to pay for misc home expenses, and daily expenses.
i feel like screaming at her that at least I am working, and will give her money every month.
but i didn't. cuz i can't be bothered and dun want to continue to listen to her nagging. last nite, she talked for 40 min.
on wed nite, she talked for 20 min plus.

tonight, there is a bbq held by my poly friends. i want to go and meet up my old friends as it has been a long time since i last saw them.
they are my closest and most trusted friends. ck, xg, sh, nic, medic ken, siti are those whom i can really trust. and they helped me before , when i ask for help.
i tot of not goin tonite, due to my mom.
but it is not worth it. juz bcuz of her. so i dun go ?
freak la
but they are my poly friends, so she would be more relieved, as it is my school friends.

i miss my poly friends
i miss my poly life

--_______----_______--_-__--___--___----_--____________---______

time to rebel
time to make a change
time to step out
the first step

the courage to speak up
has been buried deep in the cells
has been sleeping for years

wheeeee

WWWWWWWheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

I got my first gal dollfie ler.
so happpy!
brought her home for past 2 nights and slept together.
heeee heeee
I am soooo happy.
as she is a Yo-sd, so she is small size.
I can hide her easily on my bed.
Under my big blanket, inside my bunny bag, in between my soft toys and plushie next to my pillow, or right under my red and white pillow.
HHEeeeeeeeee


on mon, alice told me that the doll that i ordered did not come, bcuz the supplier sent the wrong doll.
dammit! but there is 3 other yo sd that i can choose from. so i chosed Mi (rice in chinese). she looks sweet and dainty.
she cost only 170. so cheap! but includin the face up, custom made clothes (sailor uniform, hat), and shoes. in total, it is 307.
it is still k for me. within my budget. yeah!!

though i was sad tt mimi was not here, but Mi looks cute tooo!

last nite, when i was on the bed, playin with her before i sleep. i was experimenting with her joints.
when i turn her head 180 degrees to the back, and when i looked at her from a certain angle, she looks a bit scary.
and i felt a bit scared.
i think it is due to there is no light on, only the moonlight shone through from the window.
den i was considering , maybe i can give her a gothic face up. think it will suit her.
i put her next to me and slept , but i keep wakin up in the middle of the night to make sure that she is next to me.
somehow i just felt that this doll got something. seems like it will awake in the middle of the night.
aiya... think too much ler.

16-06-08

2 pm

I have sold my luke just now. *sad* (but i only sold the body away)
and suay suay, starhub send me a sms , to ask me to pay for my overdue hp bill.
it is 260.52 nya!!
luckily, the money came in time.
so i can pay my bills and pay for other misc stuffs.
i owe a lot of ppl money, but i borrow 10, 20, 30 only .
but it is still a lot of money. T_____T

anyway, i got my overtime claims and pay.
so, i can pay for my new gal! yeah! just in time!
my yo sd gal.
wheeeeeee

the customer even made onigiri and gave it to me as dinner. waoh!!
i was totally surprised and glad tt she made it for me.

i am really stupid to buy sora and now,i sell him away.
think there are ppl who are startin to hate me or even curse me...haiz

last nite, kena scold and nag by mom.sigh.
luckily she did not beat me.
i used the computer till 11 pm plus. just when i was bout to off the com, she came in to my room and warned me to off the com.
the next thing is she gave me a long paragraph of lectures in the living room.
nag bout :
- not lookin for a part time job on weekend, so i can earn extra money and give her.
- my obsession with japanese songs and culture (useless, does not earn any money at all)
- using the com for such stupid things, eg watchin vids at youtube, at msn
- goin out on every sun , she keeps wonderin wad i have been doing
- play guitar at home, but did not go for guitar lessons.
- being naive
- gettin into the cosplay stuffs, commented badly tt cosplayers are makin themself look ugly, bu yao nian (no sense of shame)

kao. asshole.
kanina chao chee bye
fuckin shit
chao chee bye
chao chee bye
chao chee bye


i dun like my family members to know bout my band, cuz even if they know, there is nothin that they can do.
there is nothing that they can help. cuz we have to depend on ourself, our own hard work.
so, i bo bian, told her bout my band.
she was kind of expected it. cuz somehow, she found out tt i have few friends joining the superband competition.
and my msn title was , ''lookin for female guitarist, bassist, keyboardist for a band. if interested, pls contact me."
she saw my title, so she suspected it.
i thought she will give me a big thrashing after i told her.
but she didn't.
HENG ARHHH!
there is nothing wrong with forming a band. some more, we are practicing hard, trying to look for slots to perform.
that is our passion. performance is our passion.
when i told her the members in the band. her biggest concern is the only male member (bassist).
ha.
she tot that i will be interested in tt guy.
the fact is, i am only interested in the bassist's talent, as he is experienced and has potential. and all of us are on friends term.
this is one of the reason why i wanted to form a all gal band.
cuz there is few local all gal jrock band, so i wanted to form one.
and when i tell my family members tt i in gal band, they dun haf to worry that i will get involved in bgr (if it is a boy and gal band).
one of my policy for band members, no falling in love with each other. cuz probs will arise. unless they are lesbians ?!? LoLoLoL

she only warned me, to be careful of what I am doing.
warned me in a stern tone.
she warned me, cuz if she discovered more stuffs that i am doin, and is of stupid things (to her), she will beat me, take all my pay to pay for all home expenses, or at the worse, she will move out of the house.
if she wants to move out, let her be then.
the worse scenario is that, she move out, and i will have to shoulder all the financial burden. that is fine with me.
i rather have financial prob, den to have emotional prob.
at the most, i'll have one meal per day, go home cook, dun buy clothes. tt is fine with me.
i think the best way, will be, i move out.
cuz i only have to support myself.

both my bro and sis are grown up , and they prefer to work, to earn some extra income for themself.
bro is goin ns soon.
sis is takin O level tis yr. but after tt, she said tt she wants to go work, so that she will have money for herself. she dun need to take money from mom, cuz tt is a big torment for her.

i can take care of myself, cuz i have been livin with my grandma since young. so, therefore, i am more independent den both siblings. housework is no prob for me.
and i will have more freedom!!!
no more reporting to ppl bout the time to reach home.
woooh!!
my sis even commented that i can actually move out already. i don't have to be so scared of her mom. (aka my stepmom).
cuz i am a grown up, earnin my own income, i should stand up for myself.

well..sooner or later. i'll move out. i dun want to wait till i get married, and move out to my hubby place.

lately, my luck has really improved much. after goin to the temple and takin the lucky flower bath. (thx to my step mom)
i am 50% superstitious. dunno whether it has something to do with the trip to the temple.
there is few ppl around me who are willing to help me, by lendin me some money. i didn't dare to borrow much, cuz i feel pai seh.
but they are willin to help me, after i tell them my worries.
it is till then i realised who is the really good friend who will be there to help you.

anyway, i will be more careful in future esp when i am at home.
home is supposed to be a place where one can relax.
haiz..
when at home
- no using of com
- practice guitar and vocals(when okasan is not around) (practice vocal when outside, kanasai...where got vocalists liddat practice)
- read comics, newspaper, novels, no playin of dollfie, watch tv (when okasan is around)

kanasaiii ... where got ppl at home so cham de ...
tt's y i dun want to go home early after work..her mood swing is damn big la...ass hole

there is tis fella who confess his feelings to me. i was shocked, surprised and a bit ...scared.
i treat him more like a friend and little bro.
but he is willin to help me, and listen to my stupid probs. thx bro ^^
got to know more friends thru sgcafe forum. felt happy and relaxed when i hang out with them.
at least i feel better. *phew*

6.08 pm

gtg. end of work . yeah!!

emo

slept and woke up in the middle of night
thinking of him
I don't know why
the sudden thought of him engulfs me
miss him so much that I cried

the warmth of the blanket feels like the warm hug of his
singing a song of lullaby
Soothes me to sleep

------- - - ---------
| |
| |
| |

_______________




I thank you for the showering me
With concern and care

I thank you for being there for me
When I need someone

I thank you for listening to me
With your patience

I thank you for loving me
When I don't love you

- ---___----- -


I have sold sora away. haiz
the money that I got, will be paid for home expenses, dad's father day present (all thks to sis's suggestion).. haiz
anyway, hope tt he get a good family . (? __ ?)

and i'll be paying for tiara (yo sd) using my salary.
and i think there is this doll owner who mistaken me tt, i am sellin sora and is usin tt money to pay for tiara. wtf...
she didn't know the actual fact at all. it's either she mistaken me or I am bein too sensitive, thinkin tt she is talkin about me. or perhaps she is referin to someone else.
wtf

Doll list

more dolls wanted, on waiting list

- Volks

- Luts

- Angell studio (Momo -Baby, Leira-1/4)

blah blahhhh

Last night, I was watching some videos on youtube. then, I thought of the dollfies video. I search using the word, super dolfies.
there are lots of videos on super dolfies. it showed the doll party, doll convention centre, doll shops in Japan. OMG! the dolls are sooo cute and pretty.
They come in various looks and sculpts. The doll owners that they featured in the show have lots of dollfies and they are so pretty. The doll owners spent loads of money at the doll events. there are even mtv, using dolls as models. kawaiiii!

I feel like saying something loudly while looking at non doll owner, "I'm proud to be a dollfie owner."
Their reaction will be like..0_o ...wtf!!???!? hahaha.. juz by lookin at their reaction makes me feel shiok arh!

I feel like buying more dolls to collect.
I want to buy more MSD and YoSD, cuz they are smaller and lighter to carry around, as compared to SD size. Chiaki's weight is still ok. but Sora is heavy.
I have to carry him with both hands. Need to spend more them with Sora cuz been neglecting him for a long time. *huggles Sora*

I am changing job, so I'll have to pass Sora to honey to take care. cuz it will be inconvenient for me to put at home. lucky, I got to know Honey who dun mind looking after my dolls for me. think I'll give her some money for looking after my dolls. nanny fee ? nah.... she is the mommy of Sora nya... The first time we met, I find her big size. (no offence HOney!)but later on, after getting to know her better, she is actually a nice gal, humorous, easy to get along.

11.19 am

I'll still do cosplay once a while, prob once every 2 months. also depends on the availability of events to cosplay. cuz got no time to organize private photoshoots. got to work, band jamming.

There is band jamming this upcoming sun. yeah!! it's been a month since we last jammed! kao! yesterday, i finally found a guitarist to join us ler. but she'll be sessioning for us instead. so that we can have more choices to choose from, if we get few more sessionists guitarists. i didn't expect faustine to join us, cuz i know that she is in poly now. student nya.... i dun want student anymore ... but at least she has the experience, got to know her through the side band thing.

I mass sms 6 gals bout the guitarist thing, asking them to join my band. but only 4 replied me. Tabitha didn't reply!! argh!! i think she dun even want to session for us. When this band has just started, I called Tabitha to ask her join my band, cuz she is experienced and has the potential. She replied that she is already in a band, and she joined them right after her O Levels. wah kaooo! too late!! i worked with her few years back. cuz i session as a vocalist once only for her previous band. but they disbanded liao. that's why, i ask her to session for us, at least she dun have to commit for us, meanwhile i can give her time to consider and join our band. But... she didn't even reply!! i'll try calling her later..hope that she did not change her hp no.otherwise, i'll have to use the chasing method. i'll mesg her on msn, in sgcafe, sms her, call her, till she reply me..

luckily faustine is joining us.. heeeeee.. we still want our current guitarist, hydeistt. cuz she is good too. though she is not experienced, but i can foresee that she has great potential and she is a nice gal to get along. however, she tends to be quiet at times. *huggles hydeist.. long time no see her lerrr*

^^
^^/
\^^/

upcoming new dolls

Her name is MOMO



She's my favorite Princess







She has curled soft hairs and eyes like diamond



Just like a fairy from the tales



Only delicate words can describe the feeling she give me



So many pure memories left here



Oh,my dear Princess,



please,



smile with your lovely lips,



and then bring me into the air...




















Name: Koyume Tenebres
status : the youngest sis in the family
company : angell studio
sculpt : momo
char : sweet smiling face gal, but mischievious







Name : Tiara Tenebres
status : the older sis in the family.
company : angel of dream
sculpt : mimi, 1/6, yosd
char : likes to play prank, hides a knife beneath her sweet smile

blah lah blah blah blah ...

10 am

yesterday, i went for the new job interview. it went smoothly and I was hired by the company.
the boss told me that I can start work anytime, but can start work at start of july.
as for my current job, i am working till end of this month. 27 may will be my last day.
heee

the other day when i tell my colleague (he is a temp and is servin his last day), i dunno why, i almost cried and choked on my decision.
he is a patient guy and talk to me calmly, and counselled me. he pointed out that though I wanted to resign, however, I am crying. It goes to show that I do not bear to leave that place.

he was right. I didn't bear to leave the place, because I have become emotionally attached to the place. the colleagues are nice, everyone get along well. We are the back office.

anyway, i am quitting. leavin at end of month. now, i can't wait to start my new job. *excited excited*

11.23 am

The system server is slow. I can't generate the damn reports... waitin waitin

this sat is my baby cousin's 2 years old birthday party. her mom is holding a chalet at pasir ris. woah.. my baby cousin is a gal , and she is sooooo cute. like to pinch her cheeks all the time. ahhahhahahaha

tis sun, there is jamming. it's been a month since we last jammed. and i am itching for jamming session.

guitarist busy studyin for A level, drummer preparing for final year exams and go abroad (wtf?!!!!?), bassist and I working. dammit.. we are now lookin for another guitarist. preferably some one who is working on weekdays, and is free on weekends to jam, and is financially okay to jam. i dun want students anymore, cuz it will be better for them to concentrate on studies instead. currently, we'll scout for beginners too, and shall see the potential and commitment level of the guitarist.

FEMALE GUITARIST NEEDED! PREFERABLY EXPERIENCED! BEGINNERS ARE WELCOME TOO!
playing jrock, jpop songs, and some english songs.