song for u

a friend of mine is having a love prob with her bf. consoled her since last nite till now thru sms. her bf is really damn emo, self centred, only thinks of himself , and suicide, sarcastic to gf, blames himself for everything, complains bout gf's figure. what the fuckin asshole guy

there are ppl out there worse than him. and dying even earlier. refer to the earthquake incidents lately.and he wants to suicide. he dun fuckin treasure his own life, when other ppl is out there busy trying to search for survivors of the earthquake.

i didn't expect him to be so fuckin emo, so fucking dissappointed with him.
got pissed off...

took leave today. this mornin while havin breakfast, in burger king, the radio is playing some songs. and so, decided to write this song about them. as i write the song, i can feel the flames engulfing me. i could feel how she feels. i could almost feel the pain that she feels. cuz i been through tt before. but her case is worse than mine.

this song is for you, my friend.
dear friend, pls do stand up after the moments of turmoil.
you will find a better guy
life still goes on , no matter what.

(rhythm of song is still in processing of brainstorming.)

--__________-__________-___________--______________-----_________________----

after you put down the phone
You worries me more than ever
couldn't find where you go
unable to contact you
it's obvious that you are ignoring me
why does it make loving you so hard?

tried to understand and help you in distress
but you keep pushing me away
no, don't jump off that level
no, don't leave me behind alone

(chorus)
endless tears drown the night, endlessly
heart wrenching pain exists all the time, when we meet
fear occupies my whole body and mind
everytime you leave me
no matter what happen
you'll always be a part of me

swallowed my pride and the sarcastic remarks
despite all the pain that I felt
I don't want to leave you alone
the reason is because I love you more than you love me

(chorus)

help me please ...P.L.E.A.S.E .....H.E.L.P

been long time since i blog.

desperately lookin for a new job. luckily, i received an email from a online company tt i have been short listed for interview. wonder where they get my contacts. think is through some random job survey bah.. hhahaha. the advantage of doin job survey and leavin my email. just in time, when i want to change job. will be goin for the interview next tues.. all thx to my 2 colleagues. one took leave tml afternoon (when i can take leave and go for my interview!! the other took leave on next mon !!argh!!)

my job now sucks, though the workin environment is good. but i made a big mistake and it involve SGD 51 million!! but after calculating , the loss is bout SGD 6000. heng arhhh... but still... den my boss talked to me. and he is right. he personally thinks that this job does not suit me. well..he is reallly right. i myself also have thoughts of changing job.

but i have to look for a office job, cuz of the money. i have to support 3 ppl in my house. mom's the biggest creditor, 500 to her every month (cries....), sis the loan taker, 100 to her every month for daily expenses, (cries even more...), bro the random loan taker, takes at least 50 from me for every few weeks (as he is not workin now...) . at tis kind of rate, it is difficult for me to save up lots of money. even though i dun take dinner anymore. at times, i really cannot tahan, and will eat dinner. i tried to eat veri cheap stuffs, like fried mee hoon, kuehs, bread for breakfast, and dinner. but i haf to eat something for lunch, so as to support me for the rest of the day. cannot let my family members know that i am broke and not enough money.... and i walked home after work, almost everyday , to save up every single cents for transport. but at times, i cannot tahan, so i take bus directly home.

luckily, my vocal lesson is already over. so i dun have to pay for school fee ler. but i not yet pay phone bill.. bill is 130 ...cuz been surfin net on phone again...argh.. cannot resist temptation of surfin net lar.

been tryin to stop myself from goin to the dolfie section at sgcafe, cuz i will be tempted to buy more dolfie stuffs. and i did it successfully. now , when i look at dollfie stuffs, i will think of the money balance first, den tell myself not to buy anymore stuffs. i even stopped buying gothic punk clothes ler, and comics, and cosplay stuffs, and my fav jrock stuffs.. and my hangry and angry stuffs. (heard tt blood romance mayb importing hangry and angry plushies... omg!! i want tt!!!)
no...cannot spend... waiit.... tt will be months later. so i can start savin up for tt now. mwahhahahahaha.

*Muz wait for me wooooor...my hangry and angry plushie.. you'll be mine sooner or later....**

and dammnit, i juz ordered my Yosd last week..cuz couldn't resist temptation , when i was at alice shop. been thinkin of gettin a yosd for past 2 months ler.... she is on her way liaoooo. mwahahhaha. but for her, i can pay by installments. so , it is within my budget. mwahahahaha

chiaki is gettin a sis soooon.. and is sellin sora away...

Who wants to buy sora?
who wants a luke version 2 , doll of idol dollfie?
70 cm tall
but can wear AA clothes.
he can wear chiaki's clothes , which fits juz nicely.
sellin for 1000sgd.
with a pair of blue eyes, face up (done by me), red wig)
installments payments accepted.
eg. june - 200. july - 300, aug - 300. sept - 200. eg
dollfie will be passed to the new owner after full payment is made.
so, the faster u pay the full amount, the faster u will get ur beloved dollfie.
he is waiting for euuuu...

*looks around, and cries buckets of water**water can be reused for bathing...***wtf?!?**

warning :

if you want to get a dollfie,
do get it with careful and detailed planning of budget.

Luke version 2 for sale

i am selling sora away. (luke version 2) for 1000sgd. with face up (done by me), pair of blue eyes, red long wig. installments payments are accepted. amount for installment is negotiable. at least sgd$100. means buyer can pay for few months for full sum. dollfie will be passed to him/her after full payment is made.

--__________-----______________________________----__________---__________

i bought him on impulse. and i am payin installments currently. but it is cuttin into my daily expenses. i am tryin hard to save up money and not to sell him.
but i am worried that when my mom ask me for money, i dun have money to give her. and she will nag, scold and beat me. therefore, cuz of my mom, i am sellin sora away. i dun wan her to know bout sora and chiaki. otherwise she will kick a big fuss out, and throw them away. and take all my money away. so i haf to be extra careful.
hope tt someone will buy him. but i can't bear to sell him away at times, as he is still my son.

i ordered a Yosd last week at alice place. because i couldn't resist the temptation of yosd. she looks so cute when i saw her pix on the site. she is from angel of dreams. and she is soooo kawaiii. chiaki is goin to haf a new sis. but sora will be sold away soon. the money earned from sellin sora will be used for misc home exp. luckily, alice allow me to pay by installments for my new Yosd. so, i can only get her in july after paying full amount. yeshh! i am naming her Tiara, cuz i like this name. LoL. and in the website, she is wearin a tiara on her head. kawaiiiii!
well, i am stoppin at 2 dolls. after i get Tiara.

mayb i will get one more next year. but tt will have to wait, after careful planning. must really save up money to buy dolls and cosplay costumes. LoLoL. hahahaha.
temptations are so hard to resist. LoL

yesterday went to street fest at suntec. it was fun meetin up with the other doll owners, also saw my long-time-no-see friends. everyone had fun and was chatting around. a pity that my band did not get to perform for st fest, which i really wanted to . but at least, i get to meet up with the rest of the doll owners. we played with one another's doll, took lots of photos, shared doll tips, chatted bout lots of stuffs. frostburn is funny as he entertain us with his "act cute voice" (voice for his misha).LoL. atsuki was there too who was the daughter of the boss of "Atsuki". she is sooo cute too. and they joked tt she is the live size YoSD doll. LoL.

i did not cosplay as i do not have my complete set of maid costume. cuz amalina borrowed the apron from me. wore bit gothic dressing instead. and it looks not bad lar.

photoshoot

finally set up a blog for chiaki.. been wantin to do few months ago.
been busy , so didn't set up. till just now.

last sat, went to meet up with lawliet and some other doll owners. cuz we bought sd size handphone from her.
the phones are small and cute. and the dolls are even cuter! kawaiiii!

we sat at city hall and chatted while waiting for other doll owners. too bad, most of them couldn't join us for the photoshoot.
it was quite fun. we went to chijmes for the photoshoot.
link to the photos at the forum :
http://sgcafe.com/dollfie-gallery/t-mini-meet-chijmes-3-may-2008-48941.html

there were 3 of us who brought our dolls along. there is haruka hana (lawliet) , yuriko (alvin), chiaki(mine).
yuriko is the only gal doll. and she is soooo cute! and looks soo innocent in her kimono. haruka is veri handsome too.
my chiaki is cute too! he is lookin more like a caucasian, guess it is due to the blonde wig and brownish eyes and face up.
tt suits him a lot too. killer bunny offered to do face up for both my dolls. i was surprised. but i heard tt she do veri nice and professional
face up. think i'll let her do sora face first, den do chiaki's.

for the photoshoot, we came up with the storyline while taking the pictures.
it was quite interesting.

we took photos till 8 pm plus, den went off for dinner at LJS.
it was a tiring but fun day for us.
it is the first time that chiaki took photos with other dolls.
i feel veri happy and excited.
and as i look at chiaki, he seems to be smiling too, with a twinkle in his eyes.
LoLoL

chiaki, yuriko, haruka









chiakiii is gettin more cute lorrr... the blonde hair and light face up makes him look more caucasian.. heee
my ah boy.. i adore my boy boy a lot ...

when i tell my colleague tt i went for doll photoshoot, she said that it is a crazy idea instantly. i was disappointed, but i smiled and said that
it was my first time goin for such shoot, and it is quite interesting.

from now on, i decided not to tell other ppl about my doll stuffs except for the doll owner friends. haiz... ppl juz dun appreciate dollfies.
they think that we are a bunch of crazy fellas. my sis commented that we have too much free time to take such photoshoots.
we are a group of artistic gentlemen and ladies who appreciates and understands the beauty of dolls. LoLoLoLoLL.

seriously, i rather face a group of cute dolls and play with them, take pix, then to face my sis and mom. cuz they are so irritating, getting on my nerves everyday.
my sis keep spending my money by askin me to buy things for her, dinner, contact lense, misc stuffs. dinner is still ok. but other misc stuffs is unnecessary.