sick

today finally went to see doc. actually wanted to go work, den see the company doctor, cuz it is free. medical expenses will be paid by company. but i cannot tahan, so i went to see doc near my house area.

didn't went home, cuz feelin sian. everyday at home is sian, despite tt there is bed for me to sleep. took sick leave, ate breakfast, ate medicine. feelin bit better.. so went back to clubhouse and slack. watched ''initial D'' anime wif nic and darren, read comics, had lunch.

currently, reading rosario + vampire comic. like the comic. long time never read comic ler. and i like the comic. it is bout a human studying in a monster school , where all the monsters are in human form. there is various monsters in the school, with different capabilities and weapons. and the main guy char is the only human in the school. he met the main gal char who is a vampire. but is a kind hearted, pretty vampire. lots of things happened between both of them.

juz now slept for quite long. now, feelin much much better ler. but my throat feels dry, need to drink lots of water. damn la. how to practice singing in this condition? didn't went for vocal lesson for 1 whole week, cuz sick. nvr see doc for 1 week, tot tt i can be cured juz by drinkin lots of water and take flu medicine. but it does not help. cough is gettin worse..

this sun, my band decides to jam "new world" and "seasons call" by L`arc En Ciel, "yuuwaku" by glay(temptation). at first, thought that seasons call is more difficult to sing as compared to new world. after my leader listened to the song, she said that the chorus part sounds lower than new world. so, tt means, if i can handle "new world", i should be able to handle "seasons call". gambatte!
last nite, practiced "seasons call". i still can handle it, despite my condition. but i had hiccups, so i sang halfway, hiccup, sang, hiccup..aiyo. sounds so funny siah...
"yuuwaku" is the first song that i sang for a band. i once sessioned for my friend's band few years back, and we did "yuuwaku" and "rusty nail" by X japan. i prefer "yuuwaku", cuz it is lower, and need to project it powerful. and now, we are doin that song again. woah yeah! old songs sound nice too!

yesterday went to alice shop, and played with Ruki. i have this white satin material cloth in my bag, so i used the cloth to drape it over ruki. and came up with different clothings, by folding it and wrapping ruki in different ways. yeahh.. can use tt as a new clothes for Tiara.. haha. my boy boy..

28 January 2008, 2.17 pm

28 January 2008, 2.17 pm

the workload today is lesser. Has finished all the work already. Just helping to do filing.
Planning the design for Tiara’s clothes currently. Few tshirts, some with designs, either handsewn on or using fabric paints to paint.

Last week went shopping with mom , sis , bro. in the end, bought 2 dresses, 1 pants, 1 blouse, 1 tshirt for me. Also bought clothes for rest of family using vouchers. After looking at all the new clothings, I realized that the pink dress that I bought on my own looks the best.

Just now was looking through the SOY(didn’t went for the event ) event pictures, and find that the cosplayer pix are not bad. But my fav is looking at the dolfies pix at SOY!! I am going dolfie maniac now!! Arggggh! I am still waiting for my Tiara boy!!

T__________________________________________________________T

I miss my boy boy!!! I want my boy boy! I can’t wait. another 3 more weeks to go.
Like some of the dolfies at the SOY. Fav is willows doll, by the name of Yoruko. 2nd fav is Kureya which belongs to yumi. Cuz it looks veri cool, especially with the black specs. I am looking at dolfie’s pictures everyday. Oh how much I like it . ^^

Juz now came across someone’s thread at sgcafe forum. The person state that his/her mom is going crazy over the doll, and his/her mom made a bed for the dolfie. Woah!! I also want! I felt so jealous cuz the mom is supportive of the doll’s existence in the house. So good. My mom will kick up a big fuss de.

Yesterday, went jamming with team mates. The bassist is sick, so only left the 3 of us. Jamming without a bassist seems to feel different. So, the part when the bass solo comes in for the song, I have to listen to the drum and guitar carefully. Unexpectedly, I could sing quite high. But I could feel my voice breaking at times, due to flu and cold. Now, still having flu, cold and cough. Argh. I finally memorized the lyrics for the whole song, without looking at the lyrics. Yeah.^^

Previously when I am with the first band, I often jam with drummer and keyboardist only. But the keyboardist is veri slack. So, I had to play the guitar. So I am used to jam without bassist and guitarist around. A lot of time, I had to listen carefully to the drum beats and by memory.

For this current band, though we only have one guitarist. But she is quite hardworking and learnt quite fast. I can see that she is talented too. She learnt for 1 year, and plays better than me. I never went for lesson, so far only practiced on own.

Our guitarist is a big hyde fan! She likes hyde a lot and has most of L`arc~En~Ciel songs. Woah. I have 5 albums, so we both discuss a lot of their songs. Hahaha. Though drummer is not a big fan of hyde, but she likes some of the songs only. As for bassist, she likes gazette a lot. Think she likes some of L`arc~En~Ciel songs. I prefer L`arc~En~Ciel songs more than I like the members. But I do like hyde too. Cuz he is handsome!! Hahaha! Drooooolz. And hyde is almost 40! Omgosh! And he still looooks soooo hot!! And he is still single. Guess he had a hard time lookin for a gal friend who approves of his job.

After the jamming, drummer, guitarist and me went to kino at orchard. I showed them the section where official score books are shelved at. Cuz, that is where I bought the “awake” official scorebook by L`arc~En~Ciel.

Then, guitarist had to go home. So, drummer and me went to the basement and sat down on the stairs. Cuz the seat near the fountain are all taken up. I sat there, and was feelin bored, and my fingers were itching, so I took out my guitar and practiced ‘new world’ on guitar. Woah. It feels great, after stretching my fingers. And I finally could play the starting of the song. My fingers were feeling numb and tired. Cuz all the four fingers are stretched out over 5 frets! Argh! The indes finger barres the 2nd fret, middle finger is at 3rd fret/4th string, ring finger is at 4th fret/2nd string, and the pinky is at 6th fret/3rd string! The pinky is at 6th fret! Argh! If it is at 5th fret, it is still fine. But it is at 6th fret. My fingers are short!! I had to keep massaging my fingers.

Meanwhile, drummer was reading through the magazine that she bought. We sat down and chatted for bout an hour. There were Ppl who took the escalator, looked at us and giving different expressions. Anyway, I was busy practicing, so I didn’t notice much of the ppl. Heck care.

After tt, we went home. Lucky, bro and sis did the housework already. So I could take a break. Used the computer and surfed net. Watched L`arc~En~Ciel mtv on youtube. Woah.. some of their mtv is veri interesting. I like forbidden lover, kasou (flower burial), my dear, ibara no namida etc.

3.44 pm

I kept replaying kasou pv, cuz I like the song a lot. And the pv is subtitled. So I wanted to watch it, to understand the meaning. Prefer their live performances cuz the atmosphere is better. And the fans keep screaming and cheers for the performance. Hyde can really sing! Woah! I am aiming to sing like him. Hhahhaaha.

Oh yah. Yesterday I saw alex’s band in the medium studio! cuz I booked the small studio. When we reached, I popped over to the medium studio to take a look. And I saw him! He was singing on the microphone. Argh! My first reaction was to run away. I dunno y. I was acting like a fan girl. K.. he is not really handsome. But he looks bit cute and stylo. Yeah. Stylo. And most importantly, he can sing well. If I did not remember wrongly, he is in Kafein band now. Wooh. And they were jamming juz near to us. Think he forget me ler.. awww.. nvm.

My deepest impression of him singing was at Gashaus pub. One of the songs that he sang was “Ibara no namida”. He sound like hyde in that song. And I was surprised and impressed. The atmosphere in the pub, the audience crowding in front of the stage, everybody head banging together really gives the feel. I was drunk in that atmosphere. And I actually liked the way he presents himself on stage. Hmmph.

But when I see the thread at forum, stating that Gethsemane is looking for vocalist. I was veri shocked and keep wondering why. I contact the person and told them that I am interested to be the vocalist. But the person whom I contact with, told me that they wanted someone experienced. I dun mind the difficulty of the songs that they give me. Cuz I like difficult songs and self challenge. But too bad la…

6.06pm
goin off soon. Bb ..^^
think not goin for vocal lesson, cuz havin cough. Getting worse. Goin alice shop to see my dolfie, cuz miss him a lot.

24 January 2008, 12.18 pm

24 January 2008, 12.18 pm

today is busy! Busy! Busy! Work load is increasing!
It is a good and bad thing.
Good , bcuz there are things to do, and time will pass by very fast.
Bad is that have to rush the things before the cut-off time.

Argh. It’s not my fault leh, boss.
It’s bcuz of the damn ipt, who did not do their work consistently. And the broker has not send us the amended confirmation yet. I am juz doin my job by reminding the ipt to check and amend things. It is not my wrong.

Haiz. Can’t be bothered to explain ler.

6.05 PM
Hungry …. Still havin flu, cold and cough. damn. For 3 days ler.

25 January 2008. 9.35 am

argh. Haf to work.
Nvm. It’s Friday! Yeah! Yippee! Another 9 hours to go!!

11.24 am

still havin flu. Brought a roll of toilet paper to office, so that I can slowly use it. Didn’t eat medicine, but kept drinking lots of water. Better dun get sore throat. Cuz this sun, will be jamming with band mates.

Last night went shopping with mom, sis and bro. sis was very happy cuz she can go shopping. Furthermore, mom redeemed shopping vouchers with her credit card privileges. But I was not happy. Bcuz the shop that they went to, is either veri teenage style or veri casual style. Is just not my style. Though I wear casual too, however it is veri boring. My dressing is gothic punk, casual or sexy. Sian. So I bought a dress which my family would approve. during new year, I definitely cannot wear gothic punk, otherwise my mom will nag, scold, beat a hell out of me.

Sian..

22 January 2008 , 3.52 pm

22 January 2008 , 3.52 pm

yippee!! The confirmation is in. I can process the trade! Great.
My the other senior colleague took half day leave. Sian nah.

Flu is getting worse. Haiz.

4.20 pm

doin filing now. Juz ate 3 panadols.. hope tt I can get better by tonite.
I miss my son. One more month to bring him home. Yeah yeah.
I thought of sewing a big bag, big enough to put a SD, when the SD is in their sitting position. The main feature of the bag, is that, on one side of the bag, the material is plastic. So that ppl can view ur dolfie. Realized that a lot of the friends who haf dolls, they had to carry their dolls on their hand. So, this bag will come in handy. As there are few advantage.
1. the owner do not have to carry the dolfie, and carry lots of other things at the same time. To reduce load off the owner

2. though the owner is not carryin the dolfie, but the dolfie will still be noticed by the public.

3. if the owner do not wish the dolfie to be shown, the owner can turn their bag, with the cloth material facing out.

Isn’t it a good idea? But, I doubt anyone would want to get it from me. Cuz there are some bags in the market with plastic material, serving the same purpose. And currently, in the market, there is not much ppl with dolfies. And most of the target audience are still students, and they do not have the finance to pay for it.

Aww… nvm. Juz an idea of mine.

I ever thought of venturing into the marketing department. Cuz I find this kind of job is more challenging, though it is more stressful. But the self satisfaction after completing the task is much stronger than office job. And the salary is good too. ^^ Think I will consider changing job within this year, but before that, I must save up a sum of money first.

But, my dream is to get into the music industry. Music industry in Singapore is not good. It is compulsory to go abroad. And it is good to start early. At my age now, I can be in the back production team. However, I do not have the experience neither the capital. So, it will be better if I choose to be in the management team. I have lots of contacts. So, I will gather, select, train the candidates to be in the production team. I want to start a recording studio. get the right ppl, groom local talents, send them to local and international performances, organize more local music events (Jrock, Jpop. maybe S-pop too.) need to diversify, in order to attract more audience.

Aaargh. Day dreaming again… yawnz..


5.05 pm


handsome eh? This is Asagi from “D”. he is the vocalist of the visual kei band. Like his vocals. Is low, deep and powerful. Veri few guys look good in long hair. But he is one of those who looks good in long straight hair.

Their latest album look. – Neo Culture Album -




I lurv the song named “Barairo no hibi”. The mtv is nice. I watch it at youtube. Though it is a rock song, but the song is catchy. The mtv is taken at green field, and thus giving it a relaxed feeling. Asagi is getting more handsome … drooolz **fangirl mode*** **wriggles neko ears & shakes tails**

They have other nice songs too. Eg. Follow, Kuon (can be found on youtube), Canon de Colca etc.

Asagi (vocalist)





Hidezou (guitarist)


Ruiza (guitarist)


tsunehito (bassist)


hiroki (drummer)


handsome leh…

5.36 pm

veri sleepy. Dozed off …. ZZZZzzzzzzZZZZzzzz

5.47 pm
woke up ler! Was woken up by a phone call. Thought it was my colleague who called to wake me up. It is a dealer from a broker, confirming the trade.

6.17 pm

still at work. goin off soon ler.. haha ..

22 January 2008, 9.23 am

22 January 2008, 9.23 am

today came back to work. Yesterday went for course training.
Having a sore throat and bad flu, running nose. Haiz. Feel like taking mc and go out play. Hahaha. Bought his gift already and I have not pass it to him yet.

2.08 pm

juz now went back to clubhouse, to put his gift. He is havin his lessons. Haiz.
Suddenly I felt like a stupid fool. It is time for me to put down the feelings. I should give up. Should not waste my time, money on him. Asshole. Scold myself for so stuuupid.

Havin a cold, flu, running nose and slight fever. Now, feelin better after I took a walk just now. But my throat feels veri dry, need to drink plenty of water. Wah siao.. later meeting leader for learning vocal. She wants to teach me some other stuffs which is impt. But havin flu, think I still go no matter what.

Finish doin most of the work already. Only need to wait for the broker’s confirmation to be sent to us, den I can process the last trade. But I can’t go home yet. Another 4 hours. Sian.

Tiara boy!

yeah hey!! i cancelled my order wif the lady who is in charge of the doll orders.
cuz i prefer to buy the doll on spot, and bring home. juz now went to alice there, and ordered a dolfie. is a SD.
actually i wanted a guy, but later on , find tt gal is much better . cuz can dress them up in skirts. but realised tt the guy dolfie looks more pretty. anyway, finally got a male dolfie. my boy boy! think i still namin him tiara, though tiara sounds girlish.but such dolfies alwaz look veri bishounen, and when u dress them in dresses, they look veri girl.

took few pics at alice's shop, with Ruki. didn't put the eyes, but at some angle, it looks like there is eyes.






but the hair is not neat , need to tidy it.
only paid deposit, but will be payin rest of it next month, when i get my bonus. pix is bit blur, cuz usin my hp to take pix and my hp keeps lagging. haiz.

yeah!! gettin it in a month! the clothes tt is worn on him, is not a dress, is my grey shawl. cuz there is no clothes for him, so i wrapped him in my shawl. borrowed the boots from ruki **thx wor**. it still looks not bad.

Sian

Juz now i nearly cried , cuz really worried tt dun have enough money to pay for my dolfie. I really treat it like my daughter ler. Been thinkin to get 1 since last year.
have to wait for month . . .
Mom stressin me again for the money thing.
sis borrowed 10 bucks from me .
lucky the lady takin the doll order, told me tt she will strike off my name from the list. But my order is still valid. When all order is in, she will sms me to confirm whether i still want it or not.
still waitin for my bonus . Argh.

where are thou my daughter ?
under the bright moon light tonite
wishin for u
all the stars shining so bright
all for u

Tiara baby

tis is my gal 'Tiara' that i ordered.
ain't she cute?


well.. i decide to save up and see when the 10 orders are capped, whether i have enough cash or not. den i will cancel or pay.

haiz... when's my bonus comin? arrghh.

some other dolfies tt i saw online.and maybe considerin gettin it.









mom's not home. yeah heh heh. juz now practiced singing for awhile, but the voice couldn't come out fully , guess is cuz juz eaten lunch. had cereal.. veri healthy. startin to get more conscious of the food tt i eat. muz take care of vocal too. cannot take spicy stuffs.

juz now it rained heavily! the bamboo pole dropped downstairs! and i had to go down to take home, and it was raining. argh. stupid weather.
lucky , got no clothes to iron, but need to tidy up stuffs.
damn.. i oso need to start on sewin my street fest costume.

gtg

21 jan

Think i will need to cancel the doll order. Cuz i am afraid tt i may not have enough money to pay when the 10 orders are capped . If need to pay after 20 feb, den it will be k for me. Not yet receive my bonus. If we receive bonus in end of jan,den will have money to pay. Cuz i have to take in consideration of the daily expenses.

argh. I want my dolfie. Looks like i have to cancel clothes order with alice. And may consider get e doll from her. Cuz can pay her at later date. Den cancel order from the order batch. Warnin to ppl who wants to buy dolfie. Need to plan ur budget veri carefully.

i'm afraid tt if i pay for doll, den when family ask me for money. I do not have enough cash to handle misc home expenses. Dun wan them to get suspicious of my spendin and doll.

i ordered e doll on impulse without much planning. Cuz i thought tt i will get my bonus in jan. But i think is in feb. Any way , once i get bonus, i muz get 1 doll. Think will buy from alice, cuz can collect at my convenience.if the bonus amount remains the same like last yr, den my Budget will be 500.

though i may have to cancel, but getting the doll is sooner or later for me. Juz tt i have to wait patiently. Honey suggested tt tiara doll will be our 3rd daughter. Hmmm. Sounds not bad. And i will be takin good care of it.

yesterday went to meet up with kia kia, domoku,for the bishie boy love photoshoot discussion in feb. Ooh. I can't
wait. Tis is my first such photoshoot. Hope tt i can make it tt day. No last min stuffs from home pls. No jammin with band . If is on sat, den it will be k. Need to check calendar.

didn't expect kia kia to be shorter den me. I thought she is same height as me, or taller den me. She is quite cute, and i like her hair. Cool. And she style it veri nice, not veri messy. It is stylo and yet neat. Domoku is cute too. She is quiet most of time . But she is friendly too. She is really quite bishie . And she is suitable for crossdressin as guys , as the cute bishounen guys. I looked at her carefully, and realised tt she looks esp cute when she smiles. It is juz tt the black specs tt she wore, makes her look nerdy. And she is studyin in raffles junior college! Oh my gosh ! So clever! Oh yeah. Domoku will be my partner for the photoshoot.

kia kia suggested tt i should be seme instead of uke. Cuz i am outgoing and talks more, but domoku is quiet. K. I dun mind tt . Hee. And it will be fun. Ha ha. I have more stupid ideas now.

also met rina. Cuz kia kia bought some cosplay stuffs from her. And we walked around at plaza singapura. Rina is funny and it seem tt she is giving a cosplay workshop , by the way tt she talks.she keeps tellin us what to take note of in cosplay, things to look out for, tips for make up etc. She has slim down a lot. Great efforts. Some more she is tall, about 174. So after she slim down, she will have the tall and slim figure . So jealous. I dun have the height.

today is sun ler. Stayin at home to do housework, pack stuffs, move some stuffs to my bro room,cuz we need to change rooms, if got time, muz practice guitar . If mom is not in, i will practice vocal loudly . If she is in, i can only memorise lyrics and sing softly. Sigh. Juz woke up , and i am blogging with hp. So i have not check to see whether she is at home or not.

another day to go . Sigh. I want my dolfie . . . . Cries

Yeah. Got my pay on fri mornin. Paid phone bills, gave mom 400, bought book 25 of gothic lolita bible, a pink dress for new year. Bought a choker for my dolfie. Though my dolfie has not reached me, but I feel like startin to get its clothings. Cuz i ordered a dolfie on fri, durin lunch hour. Ordered at sgcafe . If not wrong, when it reach us, it is naked . With no clothes. I dun wan my dolfie to be naked , with no clothes. So decide to stock up first. So the moment when i received my dolfie, there will be ready clothes for her to wear.

i ordered a female dolfie. She is cute and i decide to name her tiara. Cuz i can't think of any japanese names. And i have some friends who have dolfie, they alwaz give their dolfie japanese names. So i decide to give a english name. And i like the word, tiara. Cuz it sounds veri elegant and nice.

tiara is 47 cm tall, has big eyes, nice nose, small lips, chubby cheeks. Ha ha. Juz now at black alice shop, i wanted to get the pair of white boots for her. But the sales girl said tt the boots are for sd. But tiara is a msd. Awww. . Tt means the boots will be a bit for her. So i got her a choker instead.

think i also want to order a hangry and angry cat plushie too. But it is only available in japan. Looks like i will need to order online. Hope tt some gothic lolita shops in sg do import the plushie. Cuz they look sooo cute.

one of the glb tt i have, have templates and directions in makin clothes for the hangry and angry plushie. Oh ! Soo cute ! At least hangry and angry is more hugable . And i can hug it at nite to sleep. Yeah.

nite. Sleepy ler.

17 jan, 10.09 pm

yesh!
it's night time! bloggin juz before i sleep.
my bro is watching the america's idol. gosh. the guy who sang the R & B song sucks man. i can sing better den him lorh.. hahaha

finished doin the housework lorh.. yeah. now mom is back. damn. nvm. i will log off soon.

ohh. chattin with tis cute guy on msn. saw him once at aries' house during christmas party . find him quite handsome.
the most unexpecting part is , aries called me on new year eve and told me that he wanted my no, and have asked her for my no for the past 5 days. sure or not? but aries dun lie, and she is veri straight forward de. i was surprised to hear tt, and it was like 12.01 am , 1 jan 2008, when she called me to tell me.woah!
such a good news to hear at the start of the year. i was totally surprised and happy to hear tt. haha.

den, last week my mom who is veri into geomancy. she read through the year 2008 book of luck. and said tt tis year is a veri good year for me. it is a year when my love life will blossom, my cupid is shooting arrows in every direction. ermm. . are u sure? u muz b kiddin me .. so far only 1 guy goin after me nya.
the guy whom i like a lot for past 3 months still treats me as a friend. well.. nvm.. no matter wad happen, i want to stay by his side and be there for him. \^^/ but dunno he knows it or not, or mayb he is juz too shy to tell me. hhahhahaha

oh yah, tis yr , my money luck is good too , as long as i can plan it well. i muz save money . save money.
ahhhh getting my bonus!!!yeah!!
gettin my dolfie!!yeah!! alice is goin to china in early feb, and i asked her to look out for me a lolita dress tt i saw in the gothic lolita bible. yeah! tt lolita dress can be worn to office. and ppl will juz think tt it is a cute and sweet dress. they dun even know tt it is a lolita dress. u knoe.. ppl dunno bout lolita stuffs.

i wore my first lolita dress to work few times. and my colleagues were drooling over it. esp e ladies. haha

i can't wait to get my first dolfie. arghh.. my dolfie. will be dreamin of it every nite.hahhaha.

10.39 pm
dammit. mom juz came in and scolded me for doin this kind of rubbish stuffs, chattin online. wad e heck. pls la. i dun use com every day. it is ur dear son who use the com everyday and play game lor. i only log in at nite and use less than an hour.

she's havin menopause. early menopause.
i muz move out by tis year. any one got lobang ? i want to move out, want to stay near to my workin area, tanjong pagar.

can someone teach me to be brave and fight back? i dunno y , i am so scared of her. lots of times, lots of traumatised happenings tt happen to me, lots of maligned times, hittings, when i'm wrong, when i'm not even in the wrong, when she is venting her anger out on ppl, and i suay suay, become the sacrifice of the day. arghh..

she is veri into geomancy. and she calculates our luck, and she said that my lucky color is red. k.. i myself like red.so tt's fine wif me. den one early mornin, she came running out of her room, used the clothes hanger to hit me on my back! when i was woke up walkin out of the room. tt hit woke me up instantly! i was like wad e fuck. she said tt my lucky color is red, so i should use red color clothes hanger, my dad's lucky color is green, so he should use green color clothes hanger. but, i use red color clothes hanger to hang dad's clothes and put in his cupboard. oh puleasssse la!!!!
wad e fuck! u even care bout such small things!! color of the clothes hanger!! wad e fuck!
there have to be a limit in believin geomancy. how true can tis stuffs be?
she even made us paint the house in the colors! her room is yellow, with white ceiling. my sis and i share one room, our room is purple. sis's color is blue, mine is red, so blue+red= purple. wad e fish rite.. siao eh. bro's color is green, so painted it green. living room is in yellow. stupid idiot stuffs.

there are lots of stories to tell of my mom goin crazy.. correction. step mom. but she is a good step mom. at least she cares for me, bothers to pay for my education, pay for my daily expenses when i was still studying. tt is one good thing. but her temper sucks to the core!!!

kk.. dun wanna talk bout her today. dun want to spoil my mood cuz of her. it is not worth it.

things tt makes me feel happy :
- lookin thru my collections of gothic lolita bible
- chattin with my beloved him thru sms ...awwww
- thinkin bout my new dolfie. yeah!!!
- listening to nice music
- listening to asagi's nice vocal.. awwwww
- watching anime...
- drawing


gtg.. nitez.... ... ...

17 Jan, 3.10 pm

17 January 2008, 3.10 pm

today is a busy day at work. Lots of trades to process. Now, it’s much more relaxed.

I really want to buy a dolfie from sites. Maybe, I’ll just buy from alice’s shop. Cuz it is quite cheap. The market rate is around $300 ++.

If the bonus is still the same as last year amount, I will get $1500. yeah! $500 will be for the dolfie and my gothic Lolita clothings. Den the rest will be split into various parts. Need to return my friend money tt I owe them, then save some for cosplay costume. And the rest will be for daily expenses.

My sis is getting more irritating bcuz she knows I am getting my bonus soon. And she keeps telling me to get such and such stuffs. so far, I only agree to share cost with her for wrapping of the psp. I got a psp as a Christmas gift from my company. Every employee in my company received a psp as their Christmas gift.

Since then, my bro have been hogging on to my psp and playing it everyday. Anyway he has not started school yet, so it is k. sometimes, sis will also take it to play. So, it seems that my psp has become their latest toy.

Nvm. At least tt will take their attention away from my cosplay and band thing. For a period of time, they have been talking bout my cosplay and band thing daily. And that really irritates me and piss me off. Esp my sis who have a sharp tongue. She keeps saying sarcastic stuffs bout it. And I can’t be bothered to tell her bout my new cosplay plans for this year.

The more things that I say, the more irritating things she will say. Argh. Anyway, I got tons of cosplay for this year. But it seems that cuz of my mom, no…step mom. So, I have to restrain myself for going too much on weekends. Cuz she keeps kicking big fuss when I go out on weekends.

Hey! Helloooo! I am workin on weekdays, I can only go out on weekends. K? after work, I have to go for vocal lessons. At times, I do go out with friends. What’s wrong wif tt? Damn asshole. Most of time, after work, I will go home and do housework. Haiz.

I really feel like moving out.

5.18 pm

dammit. Still busy now. Wad e heck.
Other colleagues from IPT dept is soo slow. Have to wait, then I can print report and process the trade. Damn another ipt in hongkong office. He’s so slow. Damn. Ass hole. Moron.

Later walking home cuz the weather is good, and is not raining. Plus, I am broke. So I am walking home to save costs , and to exercise at the same time. Takes me 1 hour and 30 min to walk home. But I dun mind.

I did that before when I was in poly. I took 1 hour 30 min too , to walk from home to sp. After school, I walked back home irregardless of weather.

Anyway, I am receiving my pay soon . yeah!!

I want my dolfie! Dolfie! It has been on my mind since few months ago. And I shall bring it with me to office, put it on my desk, next to me, have to put dolfie in sitting position, use the calendar to hide the legs, so only see the upper body. So that when my colleagues walked past, they will not notice much.

Now, I am starting to plan the type of clothes that I am going to sew for dolfie. One pyjamas, few sets of gothic punk clothes, few sets of normal clothes, few sets of gothic Lolita clothes, Jrock cosplay costume, dresses etc. hahaha.

There is this shop, Black Alice which opened at bugis village, sells dolfie accessories and boots too. The boots looks nice and I feel like getting one. The boots costs $39, and the choker cost $19. it is affordable for me and I find it veri cute. Esp the boots. Awwww… sooo cute.

But I dunno how to do face up for blank faces, and I dun wan to spoil the face.
Can’t wait to get my dolfie.. aaghhh..been thinking of it.

6.58 pm

still at work.. nvm. At least I earn extra money when I do ot. Haiz. Hungry… hungry…

7.05 pm
yes! Off work ler! Yes!
Haha. Go back home and cook dinner.. eat maggi.

16 Jan 3.23 pm

16 Jan, 3.23 pm

bored. Now at work.. but feeling damn bored. And sleepy. Though I have work to do, but the things done are all the same. No motivation.

Have to wait till 3 more hours , then I’ll knock off work.

Read some of my friend’s blog and realized that a lot of them have dolfies. Wah seh dolfies! I want dolfies too!

I can save up money within 1 month, and get 1 . or I can choose to buy one the moment I get my pay, but I cannot spend on other stuffs for the rest of month. I see lots of sites and threads in sgcafe are selling dolfies, but it costs few hundred dollars. But I dunno where I can put the doll, even if I get one.

If I put it in my room, my sis will see it , because we share the same room. But I can put it in my bunny bag, however I am afraid that I will lie on top of the bag and squash the dolfie. Cuz I put my bunny bag on my bed, and it sleep next to me every nite. But it is the safest place that I can put my dolfie. Not in the cupboard. Cuz my mom… correction, step mom will often open my cupboard and check whether I get any new clothings. So it is not safe.

If I put it in office, I either put on my working desk or below my desk (on top of a box). But it seems that I will be neglecting it. And I heard from some of my friends who owns dolfies, actually carries them out when they go out. Woah! But isn’t it a bit frustrating and difficulty in carrying stuffs , when you go out ?
Hmm..guess they are very used to it. If I were to get one, my budget will be $600. heard that alice did sell dolfies, so I think I will be buying from her. But I doubt about the quality.
Heard tt some of the gals actually put their dolfies in their bag when they go out. Woah.. tt will depend on the size of the doll. K. .think I will get one below 40 cm , so that I can put it in my big keyboard bag and bring it to work, and when I go out. Yeah. Hee hee hee.

And I will make and sew nice cute Lolita and punk clothes for my dolfie. Haha.
Currently got one bunny bag and I name it Asagi. Bought it for $60 at Alice 88th, including a leopard print tie. It has few ear holes, no fingers(damn. No fingers). No eyes. Haha. I also dun wan to sew buttons on, to represent eyes. But I have 3 pair of hand warmers, and I gave it to wear. And I put the rest of hand warmers inside the bag. My asagi is a female, but is veri boyish de. Haha.

Think I really want to get a dolfie, but there are so many dolfie threads at sgcafe. I dunno which one sells really good quality dolfie. I dunno which type I want too, as long as it looks cute and nice to me.

I want a male one, shall name it Aoi. Hee heeee.
But I bought a dolfie catalogue book few months ago at Kinokuniya. The dolfies inside looks so cute and nice…

16 jan , 4.09 pm

yesterday met up with leader aka drummer of the band. She taking diploma in music in school, and she wanted to give me proper vocal training. She wanted to teach me the new song that we are goin to jam next week, “new world”.

Though she learns drum, however she knows how to play keyboard too. Tt is one of the basic lessons that they have to learn in year one.

She taught me the proper breathing method. She has a friend who learns vocal, taught her some singing methods. So my leader taught me those that she remembers.

And I learnt bout a new concept.
Eg. If the song is in a F sharp octave, and the student is unable to reach the high notes. It is k for the student to sing it at a lower octave, at G octave.
if the notes is originally D, D, D, C, B,C. and the student sings the same notes , but at G octave , it is still k. from the view point of the listener, the listener will know that the student is singing it lower than the original singer. However, if the student sings the notes as C, C, C, B, A, A , it is absolutely wrong.

Sang “new world” and I didn’t expect to sing so high. The song is at F sharp! Kao! So, leader said tt she will choose songs that is difficult to play, and the voice range is high. And there is no reason/excuse for me to give, and say no to the songs that she chose. Gosh… nvm. Come on man. Anyway I like challenging songs. Yeah.

I am motivated again! But by band. Not motivated in work. I will still continue to go for vocal lessons at music garage. Cuz I have already paid the money, if I were to quit halfway, there will be a termination fee of $200. damn. Though paying the $150 per month for lessons is more costly, but I think I will continue to go for lessons.

Damn. I am blogging for whole day.. with so much disturbance. Have to do work, and come back blogging. Have to wait for colleagues from the other dept to key in the details, then I am able to print out the report and do the trade. Sian !

Jan 16, 4.54 pm

Yawn.. still waiting for my colleague… bored! Dun ask me why I can keep blogging like siao. I can. Juz that I cannot blog directly at the website. But I can blog using Microsoft word, and then send to my email. And I can copy and paste into my blog. Haha.

Just now , had Kentucky fried chicken for lunch. My colleagues went to buy the food and it cost $11.33 per head. Wtf! It is over budget for me. But I already ate the food, so I had to pay. So, I am not goin to eat dinner outside tonight. But I will be goin for vocal lesson, so I took the extra bowl of mashed potato for dinner. Hahaha. Oh yah. There is some muffins too. My colleague bought that for us, hmmph.. muz eat a few before I go off. Heeee…
HMM. Munch munch. Munchin on the muffin now. Taste nice. Chocolate flavour. Yummy. Yummy. There’s only 6 muffins in the box! Tt means each of us can only take 1 for ourself. Sian nah!

I got a big appetite actually .. heehee..been a long time since I went to the Japanese restaurant opposite my building to eat buffet ler. The sushi buffet… oh how I miss it. The fresh cold salmon with the wasabi inside..tasty ramen with the soup.. the sweet egg sushi… the cold meat with lots of wasabi.. yummy .. drooling ler..

5.55 pm

Damn .. damn one of the clients.. me and another colleague from the marketing department have to dig through the old records last year in the system and re-calculate the trades and find out the real reason why the client is being charged at the rate. Damn damn.. think need to do overtime. Sian!

According to my colleague, this client is high valued, and trades big volume and is important, super sensitive. So, this client wants to know about his trades details. Gosh. Arrgh. My colleague said that she has to be veri careful, otherwise she is unable to explain the things clearly to the client and to her manager.

I want to go for lesson lah. I dun wan to do overtime. Damn ..it’s 6.05 pm ler.

Work sucks. Still prefer schooling .. miss my poly days.. argh.. think I taking leave in late feb or early march.

6.07 pm

hahaha. Thx to my the other much more experienced colleague, who can answer the marketing colleague’s ques. Things are finished now. Yeah!

After work lor.. kk. Later can only blog using hp.
bb.

Songs Wishlist

There are a lot of songs tt i been wanting to perform in live. But think my band will not want to perform it cuz of different music preference, standard of playin, etc.
anyway is juz my preference. Tried singing the songs at home , but not really up to the real pro standard. But i know i can hit the notes and vocal range of the singers, but it really takes lots of practice. Sian.

1. Mayutsu no hitsugi - D
2. Barairo no hibi - D
3. Vampire missa - D
4. Dozing green - dir en grey
5. Yokan - dir en grey
6. Love flies - L arc en ciel
7. Moujya no koushin - girugamesh
8. Owari to mirai - girugamesh
9. Lost heaven - L Arc en ciel
10. Regret - gazette
11. Pride - D
12. Honyouku no tenshou - Onmyouza
and many more . Too much to list.
i am a huge fan of D . Love their songs . Love asagi voice. Oh . My love.
k. Gotta get back to work .

15 jan

Did a lot of self research this few days. Realised tt have been hanging out with too much teenagers from Sgcafe . Thus , it is like i am askin for lots of trouble. Juz wanted to hang out with different groups of friends. Got into some trouble,cuz of some ppl. Is like digging my own grave. Wtf.

now is rainin at my place. Now work is more relaxed. Have to wait for the dealer to key in the trades , den i can do the work. Bored . . So i am readin thru my lyrics, tryin to understand the meaning of song. So i can memorise the lyrics better.

broke ler . Have to wait till 17 jan, den i get my overtime pay last month. But hey, last month, there was not much days when i do overtime. Damn. I need money. Nevermind. I gettin pay end of tis week, or fri. Yes! And the bonus ! Ha ha ha!

saving up the money for home overdue payments. Thx for my dad ! Kao ! He did not pay the housing payments, phone bills, electric bills, etc. He did. But paid every few months later. Gosh. Mom is gettin angry over tt, and scold us every day. Tt is y i didn't want to go home early after work.

also need to save up for cosplay costumes, and i still owe my friends money. Must restrain myself from keep borrowin money from friend.

dunno y, i juz thought of tis pretty gal whom i got to know 2 years ago. But lost contact , erm . . To be more exact. I dun have her no. I even forget her name! But she is tall and veri fair. Even fairer den me. Gosh ! Guess is lately, cuz i want to get a pretty galfriend, tt's y i thought of her. She is sweet, pretty, tall, mature. But she had a gal friend! Heard from my friend tt she is a lesbian ! Gosh. Wanted to be her friend, Tried to get near her, but couldn't. Guess is bcuz i ain't pretty enough for her. aww. Later on, heard from my friend tt they broke up. Anyway, been a long time since i met her at the cosplay events and jrock gig. Argh . . Too bad.

bored . . . .
T

Damn it. I was just speakin up , defending for honey, but Somehow, toya and sochi got angry. Think is cuz in my previous post, i put their name. So they mistook me . Sigh. Tt's e reason why last time, i never want to put ppl's name. To avoid complications.

anyway like sochi said in her blog, the show's over. K. Let it end here. Dun wan to talk bout it anymore , cuz it will be endless . Anyway i am the forgive and forget type. And i do hope tt sochi did explain to toya tt i am not accusing toya of lying. I can't be bothered to explain already. Cuz too lazy, and dun wan to explain more. The more i explain, the more confusing it may get. Wanted to tell her i did not accuse her of lying, but it will be better tt i dun do anything.

thought of quittin sgcafe. But decided not to. Suddenly i realised, as a 25 yr old lady, i should stop meddling with teenagers prob and stuffs anymore. Let them solve their own prob, it's them for them to learn to be independent. But, i am the motherly and sisterly type of gal, so i tend to help my friends a lot. Hmmm. Must keep it to a limit.

i'll stick to my band practice, cosplay group.

wanted to have a grp of close cosplay friends, but now can't be bothered ler. Cuz workin on weekdays. Weekend, busy with band practice and do housework at home . All thx to beloved mom. No . . Is Step mom. Been so irritatin lately. Damn it.

yesterday jammed with my members for the first time. Yeah! Feels great. Everyone is quite good. Except for me. Cuz my voice keep couldn't come out fully, and the mic was quite soft. So i changed over to another mic. I keep tryin to push and project my voice out, and keep tryin to sing high. It was till the 2nd hour tt i sounded better. The bassist and drummer is quite good which is in my expectation . Bassist is experienced and have played for past 3 yrs. Drummer is learnin music. Cool. The amazing part is guitarist learns quite fast, cuz she juz started learnin last year. And tis is her first band.She is familiar with the easy song ,but not familiar with the harder song. drummer also cannot handle e harder song, cuz she say it is a challenging song for drumming. But it is easier for me, as vocal. Cuz dun have to sing higher , as compared to the easier song. Damn. Nevermind. I must improve myself too.

while we were jamming the first song, there were few guys who walked past the studio, and they looked thru the door , where there is a glass panel. They looked at us and i was a bit nervous. And happy. Ha ha. I guess they are surprised to see us gals jammin. Yeah . My band is a all gal band. So tt makes us different. And i am glad tt i am lucky to find such good members. I found the guitarist and bassist through forums . They are nice, easy to get along, drummer is funny and talkative, bassist is pretty and humourous, guitarist is sweet and friendly. As for me, i am chatty and friendly. Ha ha. Wad e heck. Talkin bout my members makes me feel better as compared to friends known at sgcafe. Argh. U knoe. . . Forums, flaming, all kinds of ppl, bull shit things.

we jammin again tis fri. And leader wants to jam L'arc en ciel song, new world. Yeah. Tt is one of my fav songs. I know i can hit hyde vocal range, all i need is practice and memorise lyrics. But difficult to sing at home esp when mom and sis is at home. They will nag a hell lot of stuffs at me when i sing, esp japanese songs. Tt's y i never practice vocal when someone's at home. I only practice my guitar. I actually practice singing when i walked home after work, when i am at the dark alley ways, the route from mrt to home. Ha ha. Guess not much vocalist practice this way.

oh ya. After jammin , i sang dozing green by dir en grey. When the other members are at toilet, cuz dun wan to spoil their ear drums. To my surprise,I actually could sing tt song in high pitch ! Gosh. Tt was shiok arh.

can't wait for next jammin. Yeah.

12 jan

Sigh. My wife,honey called me and told me her probs wif her ex. I comforted her. And after hearin the whole thing, i think the guy is lying to a lot of ppl. But i do not wish to spoil my friendship with sochi. left some mesg at her blog , hope tt she will reply by sms me. Hope tt she dun flame me or anything.

sigh. Think i quitting sgcafe soon. I juz wanted to know more friends who are interested in cosplay and jrock . Didn't want to get into the stupid shit things de.

think after this year, i may quit cosplay. If i continue to do cosplay, i will do solo, not joining group. Well. . . Depends on the situation den. Or mayb i should move on to other forums, like batsu or sgcosplay . At least it is better.

But i am addicted to spamming at sgcafe ler. Well den, i will chat lesser.

at first, i call honey as wife , is for fun only. Chatted with her on phone, n we are more like friends. Clarified things wif her.

i envy some pairs like cagey and reila, sochi and toya. I dun mind getting a girl friend , and hope to get 1 tis year. And i realise tt i treat honey more like a friend. I guess the main reason is , i still like guys, macho guys, handsome guys. Ha ha. So , still on the search for a gal friend. Ha ha. But i wonder who wants to be my gal friend and i be boy friend. Or i be gal friend and she be boy friend. Ha ha ha. But i not the handsome gal , i am the look cute gal, but like to wear gothic punk de. Hmmm.

not interested to look for boy friend currently. Ha ha. Want to concentrate on my band thing.now my bassist came to singapore, and she is livin in a hostel. She have no relative here, only a relative friend. And I am her friend , so i decide to spend more time with her .

today went back sp for the open house. Wore gothic punk , did not cosplay. Shino and jasper came down, so the 3 of us and jeno went around the school and took a look.

and i realised tt i still cannot forget jeno, despite the attempts to forget him. And i still like to hang around him, and listen to him talk bout his stuffs, watch him play com . Brought down the doggie that he gave me for christmas. We played around with the doggies. He also have the same doggie. His brother bought a pair for him and he gave me one. So sweet of him .*huggles* Hee hee. My doggie sleeps wif me every nite, cuz i put my plushies next to my pillow. Hee.

nitez. Gotta sleep. Tml, on sun, i will be meetin my band members, and jam for the first time. Yeah. Can't wait. Need to sleep.

nite dear dear. Hug him to sleep . . . Hee hee. Imagination runnin wild again . . . Suki desu.

Feelin tired, but i want to blog. Been few days since i last blogged.

Work sucks as usual. Boring . . But been more busy lately. Today kena scold by boss , well , is more of scold and reminder email. My boss send me the email stating the bad points in work. Blah blah blah. Damn lah. Muz work harder ! Cannot be too lazy. Cannot let them fire me. Instead i should start lookin for a new job, and leave the office right after i get the bonus. Ha ha.

started goin back for vocal lesson again. Cuz realised tt i paid for 3 months and only went for 2 months lesson. So decided to go for all the lessons. Due to the financial prob faced at home, tt's y i quit goin for lesson for a period of time. But i really wanted to go back for lesson, and practice. It's good tt i went for the lessons.
Learnt bout the breathing techniques, placement of sound, pitching of tone, warm up exercises etc.

really feelin tired. Dozin off soon . Nitez.